My wedding day was surreal and it was indeed the happiest day of my life. But I’m not writing to share with you how everything was well-orchestrated. Instead, I’d like to tell how God victoriously ended a chapter in my life and beautifully opened a new one.
I have no perfect past. I hoped to experience genuine romantic love or maybe patch that gaping emptiness within. My pursuit of having that worldly sense of completion left me broken to the point I considered myself damaged goods. Add to that the numerous mistakes I’ve done, my past is clearly not a path I’d go back to.
Broken, incomplete, undeserving — That’s how I felt and saw myself until I realized God was pursuing me the entire time. I was renewed and made new by Christ’s saving grace. I already knew Christ then, but His light shone the brightest in the darkest chapter of my life. He was all I needed after all.
If there’s anything I’ve learned from that experience it is that to be complete, to be truly complete, is to embrace the fact that Christ is enough. Until we realize that, our search and pursuit for happiness will be in vain.
A Vision of the Past
My hand was asked in marriage after me and Bo got back together after a two-year break. I said, “Yes.” Why say “Yes” all of a sudden? Because this time we’ve changed, we’ve become better individuals. And because he now loves Jesus and it shows.
Before the wedding, I learned that marriage is a living picture of Christ’s love to the church. Ephesians 5 gave me a new perspective on how the husband should love and lead like Christ, and how the wives should respect and submit like Christ. Not like our favorite married couple or our parents but like Christ.
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her”
Christ gave up the comforts of heaven and went down to save us by dying on the cross.
After our first kiss as husband and wife we prayed our first prayer. We thanked God, praised Him. We embraced because we were just filled with so much joy. I closed my eyes and it seemed like God gave me a vision of my past. The pain I felt then was suddenly overthrown by overflowing happiness. You know that feeling of relief when something difficult is over? Multiply that to infinity, that’s what I experienced at that moment. In my heart, I’m certain the Lord was telling me, “It is finished”.
Your current chapter may not end up in marriage like mine, but I’m sure when you give God the pen and let Him write your story it will be written beautifully.